Why This?

Every experience in life changes us in some way. Some may change our entire world and some may simply change our perspective of an inconsequential thing. We grow and evolve not on a daily basis but by each second that we draw breath. We all experience joy and we all experience pain. This is the basis of human life. Yet we are all unique. Each experience is, no matter how similar, changes us in different ways. The burning of a cake or a perfect desert; a birth or the loss of a loved one, a book read or a textbook slaved over. The joy or sorrow felt is left up to the individual. Many things have happened in my life that have changed me into who I am.

Some of the things that made me are common knowledge to those around me while others are still such painful memories I do not know if I can ever share them. I learned over a decade ago about the healing that can come from words. I also learned that I have a rather hard time verbally saying so many things; so I shall write them. I doubt this will be chronological or make any sense to anyone but me. There are days when I feel overwhelmed by the past, by the memories. Those days are suffocating and for twenty-two years I have suffered them in my head with no significant release. I felt the need to try and speak, to share, yet all I was able to do was write a few lines in a notebook. I hope to use this as a way to share more openly. I may post some writings from years past or do new ones. Or simply just write the words that I have ached to be able to say out loud.